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Language

Your words matter

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Our words matter, and being intentional with the message we are trying to convey can have a huge impact on the lessons (intended or not) that we are teaching young folks. Seemingly minor interactions or word choices can have significant impact on a  person’s emotional state. Words that encourage dialogue and that are not shaming…

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“You can’t heal somebody’s pain by trying to take it away from them.”

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“The human soul doesn’t want to be advised or fixed or saved. It simply wants to be witnessed, exactly as it is.” ~~~ One of the first things I was taught when I began my 40-hour training to become a certified Advocate for victim/survivors of sexual violence, was that our job was to “support and…

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From the Diary of a 2-Year-Old

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This post came across my Facebook recently, and it really struck me. Not only is this short story humanizing of young children, a plea for empathy and understanding, it is also incredibly effective at challenging a commonly accepted notion—the terrible 2s—demanding that we rethink what we believe we know about the behaviors of toddlers. The…

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Planned Parenthood Video Series To Help Parents Talk To Kids About Bodies, Gender, & Transgender Identities

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It should not come as a surprise that some of the best resources I have found for parents to discuss seemingly tough topics with their young children comes from Planned Parenthood. Discussing bodies and bodily autonomy is a topic covered in a variety of ways on The Bridges We Burn as we believe it is…

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Is It Possible to Apologize for a Sexual Assault?

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I have never been one for New Year’s resolutions, but for the past several years I take New Year’s Eve/Day as an opportunity to recommit myself to some variation of Dan Savage’s “Campsite Principle.” Last year it read: I will strive to leave my friends, family, partners, work, coworkers, lovers, acquaintances, communities, spaces in which…

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Help Protect Your Child from Sexual Abuse

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Empowering children with information and knowledge is one of the most effective means of protecting them from sexual abuse and at the same time fostering empathy and consent-based relationships. In the United States, we often want to shelter children from sex and sexuality, which tends to create a culture of shame and confusion around our…

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Tips for Intersex Inclusive Language

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The language we use can shape the way we see and interact with the world. In fact, I wrote an editorial about how intentional language choice and usage can help us to be more inclusive, anti-oppressive, and empathetic. Intersex is often overlooked in discussions of sex and biology, which results in intersex individuals being erased. Just as…

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5 Steps to a Sincere Apology

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Accountability, apologies, and recognition of harm caused is at the center of the #metoo movement, and the heart of building healthy relationships and smashing rape culture and patriarchy. Unfortunately we often struggle to know what true accountability looks like (because many of us have never really experienced it, or seen it modeled), nor do we know how to offer a sincere…

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