We often talk about the need for discussions around consent in the context of Universities and Colleges, and sometimes high school, the settings in which many high profile sexual assault cases have taken place. But what if those conversations happened much earlier, in middle schools, and even earlier in the home? Perhaps those acts of…
The phrase “boys will be boys” used to excuse a myriad of behaviors, from the semi-benign: aggressiveness on the playground, competitiveness on the ball field; to the truly atrocious: street harassment (formerly known as cat-calling), to sexual violence and rape. What is interesting about this statement is that it associates the behavior of grown men,…
One of the difficulties faced in the discourse around consent, is that we often only use the word, or begin the discussion, when in regards to sexual encounters. Consent is fundamental to all relationships, and to respecting one another’s agency and bodily autonomy. With children, we often send mixed messages. Tickling is a prime example.…
Fostering empathy from the earliest age is fundamental to undoing generations of toxic male socialization and replacing our current rape culture with a culture rooted in consent in which everyone’s agency and autonomy is respected. This article provides tangible examples, steps, and tips for teaching consent and fostering empathy to children in of various and…
Parents have incredible influence on their children both through what is expressly taught, and what is implicitly conveyed through daily interactions and observations. Modeling and explaining what consent and healthy relationships look like, while helping children to understand the consequences of their actions, is a fundamental responsibility for parents. This article by parenting researchers helps…
The assumption that all men and boys are sexual beings–that they crave sex, require it even, and are always at the ready to have it–not only removes an individual’s agency and right to affirm or deny consent. It also invalidates the specific emotional experience one has connected to sexual experience. Believing that the conquest associated…
Apologizing can be one of the most difficult acts, and one of the most powerful in showing our ability to empathize, to care, and to hold ourselves accountable. Apologies are often empty words, focusing on intention rather than reception. When we acknowledge that we were wrong–regardless of intention–that we hurt someone, that we acted out…
“The question remains about how to bring boys and men along in this ambitious work. Male violence is not simply a behaviour that can be turned on or off, but rather an entire complex of norms, values and practices with deep connections to the social, political and economic order. For men and boys, abandoning violence…