Throughout much of this article, I was honestly debating whether or not I thought it added anything new to the conversation on masculinities, the toxic behaviors of boys/men, and how we raise our boys in the United States. Every few months or so there is an article similar to this one that is featured in…
As Angela Y. Davis told us in 1979, “In a racist society, it is not enough to be non-racist, we must be anti-racist.” The former is a passive existence that enables oppression, while the latter is an active identity of resistance to the status quo. In a sexist and patriarchal society, it is not enough to…
I was 25 or so the first time I went to therapy as an adult. I was living in NYC, working full time, and lived with my partner of several years. The past was catching up with me in ways I did not have the capacity to handle on my own, and my partner thought…
For how obsessed our culture is with sex, we are pretty terrible at talking about what good sex looks like, how to have it by talking with our partners about mutual and shared pleasure, how to ask for what we want, how to say what we don’t. We are especially really terrible at teaching our…
The vast majority of violence in all forms is perpetrated by men (against women, other men, queer folks, children, etc.). In order to stop cycles of violence, we need to challenge toxic masculinity and expectations of manhood that discourage emotionality, empathy, communication, cooperation, and so many other productive characteristics. This is may seem easier said…
Comedy can be an incredible tool for furthering social justice by challenging seats of power and shining light on uncomfortable truths. Alternatively, comedy is often wielded by those with power—straight white men—to perpetuate oppression and discrimination by picking on people marginalized by society; by punching down. In Hannah Gadsby’s Netflix special, “Nanette,” the Tasmanian comic squares her…
As workplaces, universities, in communities, and any number of other environments struggle to come to terms with years, decades, and generations of ignoring, tolerating, or encouraging the violence of men against women, the question of accountability has been thrust to the forefront of our collective conversation. Banishment is an appropriate and necessary recourse against powerful individuals…
We still have far to go in our understanding and discussion of the violences of men in the United States and abroad. Domestically, there has been increasing recognition in the wake of acts of mass violence in schools that a common trait in each of the perpetrators–who are predominantly young white men–is a history of violence…